When I got back from Australia I split up with my long haried greengrocer. It was an amicable split as we both hadn't exactly been behaving ourselves whilst we had been apart. We are still friends now, but he doesn't have the long hair any more. Unfortunately for him he started going bald and had to shave it off!
I went back to work and back to my life of partying too much. I was enjoying being single a little too much and was sleeping around a bit. I don't think it was intentional one night stands they just kind of happened like that, because I was going for people who didn't want relationships, because neither did I. I met a roofer who was working in town but lived away. He became a regular Thursday night distraction. I only ever saw him Thursday nights/Friday mornings and it suited us both fine. It ended one weekend when he was staying in town the whole weekend and expected me to want to spend the weekend with him. I didn't, me and my ex-boss' daughter had planned to go camping on the Quantocks. He thought it was ridiculous, we rowed and I told him to stick it!
I found a gorgeous little house for sale down by the town docks and started the process of buying it. It wasn't to happen and just before the sale was meant to go through I was made redundant. I was absolutely gutted. I ended up disallusioned and on the dole. I spent the main part of the week at my friends house with her mum and the weekend at my bedsit going out on the town. I was well aware that my friend's brother fancied me, he had a slight stutter and it always became more obvious when he was in my presence. He rode a motorbike and I always thought he looked good in his leathers!
By the end of the summer I thought I ought to sort myself out and enrolled at the local college. I started doing more hours at the pub and started a Access course with the intention of going on to do Occupational Therapy. I was working 6 or 7 nights a week and still going out in town after work at the weekends. I was exhausted but I needed the money from work to live on and was determind not to give my social life. It finally came to a head when, I came from work one night around one o'clock and went straight to bed. I didn't wake up until it was time to go to work again the next day. I had missed college and apparantly my landlord had been knocking on my door several times during the day.
I ended up quitting the college course, I couldn't do both and I needed to work to live. My parents were obviously disappointed and later told me that I should have gone to them for financial help. But I had been determind to do it by myself.
Monday, 13 October 2008
1995 Return to Oz Part IV
By New Year we were at Port Macquarie. Again I went out for the night with a lad I met at the campsite. He was also staying there but knew the area well. I was determind to enjoy the night, but not to do as I had previously. We went out but I didn't drink that much and we actually saw in the New Year sat high up on a cliff beneath a light house at Nobby's point! It was beautiful looking out across the sea and then turnng back to watch the fireworks lighting the skt above the town as 1995 came in. Needless to say I was back at the trusty camper by half twelve!
From here we carried on down the coast and back to Sydney. This journey obviously involved far more than I have written about here. We saw many amazing things and places and I couldn't fit it all in here! We were on the road for three weeks, only stopping in a place for more than one night twice. It felt like we had driven right around the world but of course we only actually covered a tiny piece of Australia!
Anyway, we went back to the youth hostel and spent a few more days in Sydney. My father celebrated his 63rd birthday and I took him out for a meal in Sydney. It was Thai and Cantonese, something my father had never tried before. It was lovely and it felt very special to be able to have him all to myself. So around the end of the first week of January we flew home.
From here we carried on down the coast and back to Sydney. This journey obviously involved far more than I have written about here. We saw many amazing things and places and I couldn't fit it all in here! We were on the road for three weeks, only stopping in a place for more than one night twice. It felt like we had driven right around the world but of course we only actually covered a tiny piece of Australia!
Anyway, we went back to the youth hostel and spent a few more days in Sydney. My father celebrated his 63rd birthday and I took him out for a meal in Sydney. It was Thai and Cantonese, something my father had never tried before. It was lovely and it felt very special to be able to have him all to myself. So around the end of the first week of January we flew home.
1994 Return to Oz Part III
Heading away from the coast we saw another side of Australia. It became obviously drier and less green. Seeing kangaroos hopping alongside the road became more common and so did the road kill. Massive road train trucks were a common sight and my father took quite a fancy to them, joking that he was going to buy one and drive across Australia.
We visited an old school friend of one of my father's brothers, who had emigrated many years before. They were farming and really struggling because of the lack of rain. It was shocking to hear that they had had to shoot most of their sheep because they couldn't feed or water them anymore. It was a real eye opener. Totally different from the farming at home.
We were still on the Newel Highway when Christmas came. I had boasted to my friends that I would be lying on the beach having a BBQ, but that's not how it happened!! We found a lovely camp site and parked up for Christmas. We bought cold turkey and salad, some wine and I hung a few pieces of tinsel up in the van. It was different, but what made it really special was that it rained. Any other time I would have been gutted, it wasn't what I had pictured of my Christmas in Australia. And it really was a bit of a freak occurence. It had been four years since this part of Australia had seen rain, and the sight of children playing in the vast puddles which lay on the hard dry earth was more than enough to make you forget that you were hoping for a Christmas that was different from the ones at home! Some of these youngsters hadn't even seen rain. So instead of it being disappointing and miserable, it was a beautiful, special day. The atmosphere on the site was so uplifting and joyful. It was certainly a Christmas I won't forget.
I don't remember now where it was, but somewhere before Brisbane, I did another one of those things I am not proud of. At one of the camp sites I met up with a group of local people my age and with the agreement of my father, went of into town with them. I guess we both agreed I needed some time with younger people!! Anyway off we went to the pub. I had a great night, playing pool and drinking far more than I should have!! Anyway, I didn't go back to the park, I spent the night with one of the local lads. As you can magine my father wasn't happy when I turned up the following day nursing a massive hangover. Of course, now I have my own children I can imagine what must have been going through my father's head. I doubt he slept and must have been painfully worried. Considering we spent so much time together this was one of the only times we fell out, but I really can't blame my father for being angry and we made up pretty quickly.
We headed for Brisbane, a lovely, sensibly layed out town and then hit the coast again, and turned south.
We visited an old school friend of one of my father's brothers, who had emigrated many years before. They were farming and really struggling because of the lack of rain. It was shocking to hear that they had had to shoot most of their sheep because they couldn't feed or water them anymore. It was a real eye opener. Totally different from the farming at home.
We were still on the Newel Highway when Christmas came. I had boasted to my friends that I would be lying on the beach having a BBQ, but that's not how it happened!! We found a lovely camp site and parked up for Christmas. We bought cold turkey and salad, some wine and I hung a few pieces of tinsel up in the van. It was different, but what made it really special was that it rained. Any other time I would have been gutted, it wasn't what I had pictured of my Christmas in Australia. And it really was a bit of a freak occurence. It had been four years since this part of Australia had seen rain, and the sight of children playing in the vast puddles which lay on the hard dry earth was more than enough to make you forget that you were hoping for a Christmas that was different from the ones at home! Some of these youngsters hadn't even seen rain. So instead of it being disappointing and miserable, it was a beautiful, special day. The atmosphere on the site was so uplifting and joyful. It was certainly a Christmas I won't forget.
I don't remember now where it was, but somewhere before Brisbane, I did another one of those things I am not proud of. At one of the camp sites I met up with a group of local people my age and with the agreement of my father, went of into town with them. I guess we both agreed I needed some time with younger people!! Anyway off we went to the pub. I had a great night, playing pool and drinking far more than I should have!! Anyway, I didn't go back to the park, I spent the night with one of the local lads. As you can magine my father wasn't happy when I turned up the following day nursing a massive hangover. Of course, now I have my own children I can imagine what must have been going through my father's head. I doubt he slept and must have been painfully worried. Considering we spent so much time together this was one of the only times we fell out, but I really can't blame my father for being angry and we made up pretty quickly.
We headed for Brisbane, a lovely, sensibly layed out town and then hit the coast again, and turned south.
1994 Return to Oz Part II
The first place we went in our camper was to the Royal National Park. It was badly affected by the bush fires that had pulled me back to Australia. We were there almost a year after the fire and it was truely amazing to see how it was coming back to life. Plants sprouting new green shoots through the blackened earth, and wildlife beginning to reinstate itself. From here we headed on down the coast. I was desperate to take my father to the Blue Mountains, which I had been to the first time I was in Australia. It is one of the most beautiful places I have ever been and was desperate to share it. When we got there it was foggy! I was so disappointed, it was still beautiful but you just couldn't see enough to really appreciate it.
We headed for Canberra and after taking in the views from Black Mountain Lookout headed into the city. Aaaaaah! Beautiful place but what a complete and utter nightmare for the visitor!! For anyone who doesn't know, Canberra is based on circles. Circular roads all linked and getting smaller. It's fine if you know which circle you are on, but we found it ridiclulously confusing and didn't stay long! We found a campsite outside of the city and rested our brains. That night we witnessed an amazing thunderstorm. It was quite a long way off but from our campsite but we had a fantastic view. We sat at the park's benches with a 'tinny' and watched as it rolled and flashed across the horizon.
The next day we moved on down the coast. Heading for Melbourne, we followed the coast road, visiting attractions and stopping off overnight in camp sites wherever suited us. We stayed a night on Phillip Island, which lies just off the coast of South Australia below Melbourne. It is an amazing National Park with nature reserves and rehabilitation centres. We were lucky enough to see the rafts of penguins coming into the beach and heading for their nests. What a way to spend an evening. Before that I had no idea there were penguins somewhere like Australia!
Melbourne was stunning, although it rained. It has an amazing huge undercover market so we spent a lot of time there shopping for souvenirs. The trams were scary! Really nice to see but they made driving very confusing. When you want to turn right, you have to pull over to the left, wait for the trams then take your turn! After a night just outside Melbourne we hit the Newel Highway and headed north.
We headed for Canberra and after taking in the views from Black Mountain Lookout headed into the city. Aaaaaah! Beautiful place but what a complete and utter nightmare for the visitor!! For anyone who doesn't know, Canberra is based on circles. Circular roads all linked and getting smaller. It's fine if you know which circle you are on, but we found it ridiclulously confusing and didn't stay long! We found a campsite outside of the city and rested our brains. That night we witnessed an amazing thunderstorm. It was quite a long way off but from our campsite but we had a fantastic view. We sat at the park's benches with a 'tinny' and watched as it rolled and flashed across the horizon.
The next day we moved on down the coast. Heading for Melbourne, we followed the coast road, visiting attractions and stopping off overnight in camp sites wherever suited us. We stayed a night on Phillip Island, which lies just off the coast of South Australia below Melbourne. It is an amazing National Park with nature reserves and rehabilitation centres. We were lucky enough to see the rafts of penguins coming into the beach and heading for their nests. What a way to spend an evening. Before that I had no idea there were penguins somewhere like Australia!
Melbourne was stunning, although it rained. It has an amazing huge undercover market so we spent a lot of time there shopping for souvenirs. The trams were scary! Really nice to see but they made driving very confusing. When you want to turn right, you have to pull over to the left, wait for the trams then take your turn! After a night just outside Melbourne we hit the Newel Highway and headed north.
Tuesday, 16 September 2008
1994 Return to Oz Part I
I started to get itchy feet again. I was intending to head to South America. I have always fancied Peru and Chile. But it was a year that Australia had some devastating bush fires and it was all over the news. I had fallen in love with Australia last time and was drawn to go back. I convinced work to let me take two weeks paid holiday and two weeks unpaid. None of my friends could afford to go so in the end I convinced my father to come. He had always wanted to go to Australia and was coming up 63 so it was now or never. He had never flown before and had only been as far as Germany.
So in December '94 I said goodbye to my long haired bassist at the coach station and off we went. Many people asked if my mother minded us going away at Christmas but as far as she was concerned it was two less people to worry about! We flew via American airlines to Boston. It was cheaper to fly that way round even though it took longer. I was just a two days away from my 21st birthday and because it was an American airline they wouldn't allow me to drink on the plane. We stayed the night in Boston and had a bit of a look round. It was very cold but also beautiful with all the Christmas lights.
We had to make two connecting flights the next day and finally the night before my 21st birthday we set out for Oz from LA. My father had a quiet word with one of the airhostesses and as we passed midnight she brought out two glasses of champagne and an unopened bottle. The flight across the ocean from America to Australia is aparantly renowned for it's turbulence. Indeed, I have never experienced anything like it since. My father and I were sat strapped in, exchanging looks as we grabbed at our glasses of champagne as they flew passed our face! Several times the plane seemed to drop huge distances and I just told myself that if the air hostesses weren't screaning yet then neither should I. Unfortunately just a few short hours after we rolled into the 10th of December we crossed the international date line and it was suddenly the 11th! It was my birthday no more. So I had a very short 21st but at least I remember it!
We finally made it to Sydney and set about finding somewhere to stay. We were totally winging it and had decided on Youth Hostels for at least some of our stay. We booked into a YH in a suburb of Sydney called Glebe. We spent a few days there while we got over our jet lag. I hooked up with one of the guys that worked there, so when my poor old father went to bed early I went out to play! I actually bumped into someone I knew in a bar in Glebe. I knew he was in Australia at the time but I had no idea where, and it really is a big place isn't it.
When we had recovered from our flights and had a look round Sydney we hired a camper van. Well my father did, I couldn't afford it!! And we set off on our 'wherever the road leads us' adventure.
So in December '94 I said goodbye to my long haired bassist at the coach station and off we went. Many people asked if my mother minded us going away at Christmas but as far as she was concerned it was two less people to worry about! We flew via American airlines to Boston. It was cheaper to fly that way round even though it took longer. I was just a two days away from my 21st birthday and because it was an American airline they wouldn't allow me to drink on the plane. We stayed the night in Boston and had a bit of a look round. It was very cold but also beautiful with all the Christmas lights.
We had to make two connecting flights the next day and finally the night before my 21st birthday we set out for Oz from LA. My father had a quiet word with one of the airhostesses and as we passed midnight she brought out two glasses of champagne and an unopened bottle. The flight across the ocean from America to Australia is aparantly renowned for it's turbulence. Indeed, I have never experienced anything like it since. My father and I were sat strapped in, exchanging looks as we grabbed at our glasses of champagne as they flew passed our face! Several times the plane seemed to drop huge distances and I just told myself that if the air hostesses weren't screaning yet then neither should I. Unfortunately just a few short hours after we rolled into the 10th of December we crossed the international date line and it was suddenly the 11th! It was my birthday no more. So I had a very short 21st but at least I remember it!
We finally made it to Sydney and set about finding somewhere to stay. We were totally winging it and had decided on Youth Hostels for at least some of our stay. We booked into a YH in a suburb of Sydney called Glebe. We spent a few days there while we got over our jet lag. I hooked up with one of the guys that worked there, so when my poor old father went to bed early I went out to play! I actually bumped into someone I knew in a bar in Glebe. I knew he was in Australia at the time but I had no idea where, and it really is a big place isn't it.
When we had recovered from our flights and had a look round Sydney we hired a camper van. Well my father did, I couldn't afford it!! And we set off on our 'wherever the road leads us' adventure.
1994 Comings and Goings
A while after that all happened, I started seeing another guy that I met at the pub and he ended up moving into my bedsit. One night I went out with some friends from work and because it was in another town stayed the night at one of my colleagues houses. When I returned the next day I was met with a note on my door telling me to contact the landlord a.s.a.p. Still hungover I went downstairs where the landlord lived to be told that my boyfriend had been rushed to hospital early that morning with severe stomach pains. I promptly jumped back into the car and drove all the way back to the town I had just left because that is where the hospital was. (What a difference a mobile phone would have made!)
My boyfriend was seriously ill. Somehow he had developed a blockage in his intestines he was in severe pain and was starting to bring back some of the stuff that couldn't get through the blockage. He had been heavily sedated while they were carrying out tests to try and ascertain the cause of the blockage. It had to be unblocked soon or his intestines were likely to rupture. I then drove all the way to his parents house, which was miles away, but I didn't want them to hear about it on the phone. When they had been informed I rushed back to the hospital. He underwent sugery to remove a ring of muscle that had grown across a part of his intestine and after a few days was allowed to return home.
My boyfriend was a stone mason and obviously couldn't work for a while after his operation, but as time went on and he returned to health he showed no sign of getting back to work. I was running out of money fast. The rent had gone up since he had moved in and I was paying for all the food and bills. I pushed and pushed him to go back to work but he didn't seem interested. The relationship suffered and eventually I told him it was over. I gave him two weeks to sort himself out. It was awful, we were still sharing the same bed and there was no where to go. Eventually he did leave and left me completely skint.
After that I started seeing more of my ex boss' daughter again. We would go out in town together and then crawl back to the Esso garage for Lilt and Pickled Onion Monster Munch. My friend was younger than me and had fake I.D. to get her into the clubs, sometimes she would get in and I would be refused because I didn't have I.D.! There were two places to go at the time. Thursdays and Fridays we went to this awful place where you could get in with jeans on. It was so rough, not one night went passed without at least ten fights. It was a time when our town was particularly rough anyway and there were often stabbings at the weekend. The other place you couldn't get in with jeans on, so that was Saturday night dress up. There were the same idiots and usually fights but it was just a little bit classier.
We met a group of guys who regularly had parties at one of their houses and we would go back there after town. Some were in a band and we used to go back, drink some more and have a smoke while they strummed guitars. I met one in particular who was a bassist. He came back to our friend's house one night and tied a banjo with a broken string to my leg. Funny the things we remember. I have always loved bass guitar, it travels through your body from the floor. He had long blonde hair and probably fancied himself more than me but we got together. He was a greengrocer during the day and used to bring me fresh fruit and veg (how romantic) and then I would cook him tea!
My boyfriend was seriously ill. Somehow he had developed a blockage in his intestines he was in severe pain and was starting to bring back some of the stuff that couldn't get through the blockage. He had been heavily sedated while they were carrying out tests to try and ascertain the cause of the blockage. It had to be unblocked soon or his intestines were likely to rupture. I then drove all the way to his parents house, which was miles away, but I didn't want them to hear about it on the phone. When they had been informed I rushed back to the hospital. He underwent sugery to remove a ring of muscle that had grown across a part of his intestine and after a few days was allowed to return home.
My boyfriend was a stone mason and obviously couldn't work for a while after his operation, but as time went on and he returned to health he showed no sign of getting back to work. I was running out of money fast. The rent had gone up since he had moved in and I was paying for all the food and bills. I pushed and pushed him to go back to work but he didn't seem interested. The relationship suffered and eventually I told him it was over. I gave him two weeks to sort himself out. It was awful, we were still sharing the same bed and there was no where to go. Eventually he did leave and left me completely skint.
After that I started seeing more of my ex boss' daughter again. We would go out in town together and then crawl back to the Esso garage for Lilt and Pickled Onion Monster Munch. My friend was younger than me and had fake I.D. to get her into the clubs, sometimes she would get in and I would be refused because I didn't have I.D.! There were two places to go at the time. Thursdays and Fridays we went to this awful place where you could get in with jeans on. It was so rough, not one night went passed without at least ten fights. It was a time when our town was particularly rough anyway and there were often stabbings at the weekend. The other place you couldn't get in with jeans on, so that was Saturday night dress up. There were the same idiots and usually fights but it was just a little bit classier.
We met a group of guys who regularly had parties at one of their houses and we would go back there after town. Some were in a band and we used to go back, drink some more and have a smoke while they strummed guitars. I met one in particular who was a bassist. He came back to our friend's house one night and tied a banjo with a broken string to my leg. Funny the things we remember. I have always loved bass guitar, it travels through your body from the floor. He had long blonde hair and probably fancied himself more than me but we got together. He was a greengrocer during the day and used to bring me fresh fruit and veg (how romantic) and then I would cook him tea!
1993 - 1994 A second Chance
I was lucky. He missed my nose. I had a split lip though, that swelled and bruised a treat. I was also covered in massive bruises on my arms and legs. My father apologised! He didn't like him all along, but as I have said before he didn't want to interfere and wanted me to learn for myself. He didn't know this was going to happen though of course, or he would have said something. My father didn't need to apologise for anything, he was there to pick me up and that is what mattered.
I went to see my boyfriend the next day. I was afraid of how he would react but I wanted him to see what he had done to me. He could obviously see my face and I stripped off to show him the extent of the bruising. He was horrified. He was hugely remorseful and even cried. He promised that he would stop drinking so much and maybe get help with his jealousy and anger. I have to admit that he was very sorry and a complete state, but not nearly as much as me. We split up, but I continued to see him and his friends. We managed to maintain a reasonable friendship and enjoyed eachother's company without the complications of a relationship.
One Wednesday, in December , I had a huge row with my mother. I don't remember what it was about, but we clashed a lot. By the Saturday I had moved out. My first home was a bedsit in the town. It was a fair size room with a double bed, wardrobe, chest of drawers, a table and chairs, a little sofa, and a sink and mini oven thing. The shared shower room and toilet was just outside my room. It wasn't much but it was mine. I could smoke in it, drink in it and come in whenever I wanted. It was a five minute walk from work and the same into town. It was also right next to a 24hr Esso garage, so there were always fags, day or night.
I also started to help out in the pub that my exboyfriend and I drank in, a couple nights a week. Our relationship strengthened and I decided to give it another go. Then one night he came back to the pub pissed, after having been to a cider farm with a friend. Cider was one of things he just shouldn't have drunk. I could see something in his eyes that scared me. I know should have waited until he was sober, but I suddenly had this need to get away. At the end of my shift I told him it was over, I couldn't carry on with the fear of something kicking off every time he had a drink. He followed me out to the car park, grabbed me by the throat and pushed me backwards over the roof of my car. I was begging him not to hurt me as he raised his fist. Then something seemed to click in his head and he let me go. He turned his attentions on my car instead and gave it a good kicking as I got in it and tried to drive away. He was trying to smash the windows with his fists.
I went to see my boyfriend the next day. I was afraid of how he would react but I wanted him to see what he had done to me. He could obviously see my face and I stripped off to show him the extent of the bruising. He was horrified. He was hugely remorseful and even cried. He promised that he would stop drinking so much and maybe get help with his jealousy and anger. I have to admit that he was very sorry and a complete state, but not nearly as much as me. We split up, but I continued to see him and his friends. We managed to maintain a reasonable friendship and enjoyed eachother's company without the complications of a relationship.
One Wednesday, in December , I had a huge row with my mother. I don't remember what it was about, but we clashed a lot. By the Saturday I had moved out. My first home was a bedsit in the town. It was a fair size room with a double bed, wardrobe, chest of drawers, a table and chairs, a little sofa, and a sink and mini oven thing. The shared shower room and toilet was just outside my room. It wasn't much but it was mine. I could smoke in it, drink in it and come in whenever I wanted. It was a five minute walk from work and the same into town. It was also right next to a 24hr Esso garage, so there were always fags, day or night.
I also started to help out in the pub that my exboyfriend and I drank in, a couple nights a week. Our relationship strengthened and I decided to give it another go. Then one night he came back to the pub pissed, after having been to a cider farm with a friend. Cider was one of things he just shouldn't have drunk. I could see something in his eyes that scared me. I know should have waited until he was sober, but I suddenly had this need to get away. At the end of my shift I told him it was over, I couldn't carry on with the fear of something kicking off every time he had a drink. He followed me out to the car park, grabbed me by the throat and pushed me backwards over the roof of my car. I was begging him not to hurt me as he raised his fist. Then something seemed to click in his head and he let me go. He turned his attentions on my car instead and gave it a good kicking as I got in it and tried to drive away. He was trying to smash the windows with his fists.
A couple of days later I went to see him to see if he would pay for the damage to my car. The reaction I got this time was completely different. I'm guessing he now knew that he wouldn't get me back again. He ran out of the house threatening me and I had to jump in my car and drive away. I broke off all contact after that and haven't seen him since. I continued to work at the pub but he started drinking elsewhere.
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